One deleted; Ask isn't a good place for quippy one-liners that don't answer the question.

One deleted as a duplicate.

(Made link clickable in aramaic's comment.)

One deleted for not answering the question.

One comment removed for not answering the question. Please carry on.

And two more deleted for not answering the question; sorry, missed them on my first go-around!

Two deleted, one for being unnecessarily rude to the asker (without answering the question) and one for replying to that comment.

Hi folks, please remember that engaging in a back-and-forth in Ask is not encouraged. Please leave your answer to OP's question and move on. Please refrain from engaging any further.

Corrected post to redact some personal information, at the user's request.

evilmonk: "you were not safe. he could have hurt or killed you. stop making excuses for him."

This is an answer, and it's not wrong, but it's also profoundly unkind to an Asker who has done nothing to deserve it. Please, folks, in questions that are about abuse, consider being gentler to Askers who are already feeling fragile.

One deleted for both arguing with another answerer and not answering the question as asked.

One deleted as noise.

One comment deleted for continuing to do the thing i said to stop doing (and for not answering the question).

Hi, folks! There's a weird dynamic in here with some of the answers, and i don't love it: several folks have validated the Asker's right to say no, but then gone on to point out that she could in fact say yes instead. This seems to me to be a kind of low-key interrogation of the premise of the question.

I'm leaving all of those up for now, but please note that "well, you could say yes" is not an answer to the question "how can i say no in a way that won't have negative effects on me/my property".

Separately, one comment deleted for not even attempting to answer the question.

One deleted for not answering the question.

One deleted for not answering the question.

Folks, Ask is not a good place to encourage people to violate the law (many jurisdictions require two-party consent for audio recording) or their employment agreement (which may also prohibit recording, for privacy and security reasons). At the very least, if your answer recommends that people do either of these things, it should be carefully considered and done with very good reasons, and you will need to show your work on that.

I'm not deleting anything out of the thread at this point, but please be mindful.

One deleted. Ask is not a venue for complaining about the subject of the Asker's question.

Spoke too soon: i'd missed a different comment which was not an answer at all; it has been deleted. Please do not quibble with the premise of an Asker's question in order to make a side point.

One deleted for not answering the question. Please do not go off on tangents or post chatty nonresponsive replies in Ask.

I'm not deleting anything, not least because i would have to leave a giant hole in the thread here, but please do not advocate things that are likely to get people in trouble with the cops in Ask. Especially do not do it if you are joking, because, also, please do not post joke answers in Ask.

Whoops, my bad. A second comment was referencing the deleted comment, and i missed it. So i have now deleted that one too. Sorry, all!

Post updated to fix a typo, at the Asker's request.

Hey, folks. Please keep the conversation focused on genuine, non-snarky answers.

One deleted for violating the LLM content policy.

Several comments deleted. Folks, Ask is not a place for attacking the premise of the Asker's question, or getting into the weeds about one's grievances about modern life. Modern life sucks in many ways! But people still have questions irrespective of that fact!

Hey, folks. One deleted. I strongly advise against making blanket statements about strangers 'using trauma as a…wedge'; that's getting into some ugly misogyny-adjacent territory, particularly when said about a woman who is perceived as insufficiently sexual.)

I'm letting everything else stand in here for now, because i think that there's information contained in the back-and-forth that is useful for the asker (for one thing, it is an excellent example of how different people are going to have wildly different reactions to any kind of request related to sex/sexuality). That said, Ask is not a place for talking to (or yelling at) other users; answer the question or take it to MeTa, please.

A couple of comments removed left others as they contain useful advice. Let's try to recenter comments in this Ask around the actual question being asked (recommendations for Bike horns) rather than providing general advice for cyclist and pedestrians.

One comment removed, please try to articulate your answer rather than adding short comments the do not address the question. Please refer to the Ask Guidelines located at the bottom of the Content Policy.

One comment removed, please try to articulate your answer rather than adding two word comments. Please refer to the Ask Guidelines located at the bottom of the Content Policy.

One comment edited and one deleted at poster's request.

One comment deleted. Wrong thread.

One comment deleted at the user's request!

One deleted for not answering the question. The Canadian government website about eligibility doesn't actually contain the in-depth guidance the Asker needs!

One comment deleted. Saying that someone "belongs in a mental institution" is ableist, and doesn't answer the Asker's question.

Highlighting that Adam and Zac's pronouns are He/Him. Please refrain from using other pronouns.

Just an FYI, LOOKING: Feel free to comment if you need to clarify something or add more details, but it's not expected or encouraged to reply to every answer in an Ask thread you've posted!

One comment removed for not being an answer. Ask is not a place for objecting to or commenting about the premise of an Asker's question. When in doubt, please review the Subsite Guidelines for AskMeFi in the Content Policy.

One deleted for noise.

One comment removed, please avoid questioning OP's mental clarity or trying to diagnose them.

Edited this comment by kate4914 to fix the links. Please carry on.

Stop it with the back-and-forths, this is not a place for discussion.

One deleted because it responded to a deleted comment.

One comment removed. Please be considerate and respectful and avoid making snarky comments, OP is looking for advice.

Note that OP uses gender-neutral pronouns to describe their friend. Please be considerate and respectful by respecting the pronouns provided instead of using "s/he" in your response.

One comment removed. Please avoid arguing with other members' responses and remember that Ask MetaFilter comments should address the main question being asked.

One comment deleted. Please avoid arguing with the OP, instead, please address the main question being asked.

One deleted for noise.

Removed a duplicate comment.

One comment removed. Please read the question carefully before commenting. As OP said: "But I do want more traffic and voices than FanFare's book section"

One non-answer comment removed, as per the Content Policy.

One deleted. Poster’s request.

Hi, one comment has been removed, per the Content Policy, for not answering the question and posting a joke. Please remember that AskMetaFilter is more tightly moderated and comments need to answer the question being asked.

One comment removed. Please refer to the AI Generated Content section of the Content Policy

A comment suggesting the pain may be in the OP's head has been removed.

Take people, especially women, at their word when they say they're in pain.

Hey falsedmitri, the link to that screenshot is borked. If you post it in the thread, I'll fix it in the post.

One deleted. Duplicate.

One comment removed because it simply told the OP to search previous questions, which is not really helpful.

Several comments removed, please stick to the OP's request: "I would appreciate only personal narratives in an answer to this question, not general answers on the nature of alcoholism, addict psychology, or anything of that nature."

stoneandstar: "Just fill out the questions, man, it’s not that hard. You sound very difficult!"

Please focus on helping the OP and avoid berating them, 'cause that rarely works. OP is clearly having difficulties and making them feel worse about the problem they're having can be discouraging.

One comment removed at the writer's request.

Fixed!

Another comment removed for not answering the question. From the Content Policy:

Ask MetaFilter comments should address the main question being asked. Jokes, derailing the conversation, ranting, picking a fight or chastising the asker, arguing among commenters, single word comments and other non-answers will probably be removed.

Couple of comments removed for not answering the question.

One comment removed. Please avoid arguing with other members' responses and remember that Ask MetaFilter comments should address the main question being asked.

One deleted. Poster’s request.

Hey, if your comment includes the words "I will almost certainly get dinged here for unhelpful victim-blaming or finger-wagging or condescension..." make the choice not to comment and move on, or adjust your comment to not be those things.

That comment and a response have been removed.

One comment removed for not really answering the question and getting into weight loss issues, which the OP asked people to avoid in this thread.

Hey OP, if find yourself veering towards suicidal ideation or harming yourself, please check out the ThereIsHelp Wiki page. It’s a list of support resources compiled by volunteer MeFites, so take a look and if you can't find resources near you, feel free to reach out to the mods with your general location and we can post it to the thread so others can help with finding help near you.

Just a reminder that threadsitting is discouraged. Ask MetaFilter is intended to serve as a place to leave your question to be answered by the community, without frequent back-and-forth commenting.

...but I can’t stress enough how much I’m not looking for weight loss tips or advice to lose the weight...]

Hi, mod here, am leaving a note for other mods to keep an eye on this thread. But if such comments do appear, please flag them and please don't hesitate to do so thinking someone else will flag them. Comments with a lot of flags will alert mods, so flag early a

One comment deleted, please refer to the AI Generated Content: section of the content policy.

One deleted. Noise.

One comment removed for not answering the question. This isn't so a question about Korean cuisine.

Hi folks, just a mod note to recommend that people be gentler with those in abusive situations. We know the intention is good, but to those within the situation, the forceful, authoritative tone can feel like a further erosion of their agency and cause the person to shut down or ignore the suggestions, even if they are helpful. Please try to moderate your tone for the person who really needs the help.

One comment removed. Please avoid arguing with other members' responses and remember that Ask MetaFilter comments should address the main question being asked.

One comment removed for being in the wrong thread.

not_that_epiphanius, if you'd like the text of your comment, feel free to email the mods avia the Contact Us page.

Comment about the GoFundMe Campaign deleted (it is inappropriate for a third party to run a fundraiser for someone else without their permission, and should not be promoted here). Reaching out to the member who set up the fundraiser separately.

One deleted. Comment does not answer the question.

One Deleted. Comment seems to be a typo/noise.

One comment hidden as it was derail, but it was not removed to make the context clear in terms of the OP's response.

OP, and anyone, please read questions carefully and be extremely mindful in giving any weight loss and exercise advice i.e. avoid doing it unless it is specifically requested.

No comments have been removed.

One deleted. Poster’s request.

Double comments deleted. Poster’s request.

Hey, if your comment starts with "Wow, I know this is off-topic here.." please consider not posting the comment. Ask MetaFilter has stricter guidelines for comments and they need to answer the question.

Comment removed.

Above comment edited to correct a typo that was flagged.

AlexiaSky: "I attempted to link a paper from foodprotection.org but the filter says it contained a slang word so I can't post it."

Hi, please use the Contact US form to email the mods the link to the paper, so we can take a lot at the filter. Thanks!

Moved the last paragraphs below the fold.