Hey, folks. One deleted. I strongly advise against making blanket statements about strangers 'using trauma as a…wedge'; that's getting into some ugly misogyny-adjacent territory, particularly when said about a woman who is perceived as insufficiently sexual.)
I'm letting everything else stand in here for now, because i think that there's information contained in the back-and-forth that is useful for the asker (for one thing, it is an excellent example of how different people are going to have wildly different reactions to any kind of request related to sex/sexuality). That said, Ask is not a place for talking to (or yelling at) other users; answer the question or take it to MeTa, please.
I'm letting everything else stand in here for now, because i think that there's information contained in the back-and-forth that is useful for the asker (for one thing, it is an excellent example of how different people are going to have wildly different reactions to any kind of request related to sex/sexuality). That said, Ask is not a place for talking to (or yelling at) other users; answer the question or take it to MeTa, please.